Memories of a Dead Person!
Wednesday, October 22
Oh God, it is so tight and dark here. I think I have been here for about 3 hours. Out there, the weather was very hot. Here it’s cool and pleasant, only if it wasn’t too dark. Why am I here?
Thursday, October 23
I am starting to panic now….Okay, enough with your silly jokes. Somebody get me out of here. Hey, you out there… get me out. I am not dead. Come on; don’t tease me any more…hello?
Friday, October 24
Today, all day I was thinking hard, trying to figure why I ended up here. Vaguely I remembered the last picture in my eyes. I was crossing the pedestrian’s line and there it was: A shiny, red, convertible sport car speeding towards me. I saw another image too: a young blond woman who was putting lipstick while looking at herself in the car’s mirror. I remember her scream and… then; bang! Pain and blood was the last thing that I remember.
Later I saw a bunch of men and women in white uniforms standing around me scratching their head and talking about me. I tried to say something, but nothing came out of my mouth. Finally one of the doctors took a coin out of his pocket and flipped it in the air. I don’t know if it was head or tail, but I am sure the young doctor won the argument. He called somebody to transfer my body to the morgue.
Man! It was freezing in there. I was totally naked with a thin sheet on me. They even didn’t care to throw a blanket on me. All of my body’s hair was erected. Thank God that I didn’t catch a cold!
Saturday, October 26
I have missed the world outside. Saturday night used to be a big night for me. I went out with friends, hung around bars and night clubs and stayed up all night. Thank God I don’t have a date with my girlfriend; otherwise she could kill me because I didn’t ring her for the weekend plans.
Sunday, October 26
Today is really nice and beautiful, Very sunny and mild. The cemetery is very crowded. Many came to visit the lost and loved ones. Most graves have visitors, but not mine. God damn these phony, so called friends. If I were alive, I am sure that right now, the phone in my apartment would be ringing off the hook. I think a friend who hangs around with you only when you are healthy and alive is not a true friend.
By the way, today they change the time and it gets darker one hour early. Not that it is a big matter for me in this dark hole, but since I have to get up earlier, I should quit writing and sleep. I am so dead tired, and I don’t know why!?
Monday, October 27
Today, I think it was about
I wish I were alive and I could slap the medical examiner in charge of my case.
Tuesday, October 28
Today I tried to meditate and stay calm. In that situation, that was about the only thing I was able to do. I convinced myself that my situation is not as bad as it looks. Imagine if I was up there right now, I could be stuck in the city’s rush hour traffic, dealing with my stressful job or finding ways to pay my large and small bills. I remember those days (When I was alive) every afternoon about
Wednesday, October 29
As of now, it has been about a week that I have not had even one puff of cigarette. It seems that I breathe better than before and have less difficulty with my chronic asthma! If it wasn’t so damp and humid in this grave, I am sure I would be able to get rid of this damn asthma and addiction for the rest of my life! I think; all together, I am more calm and relaxed at this point, even without smoking.
Thursday, October 30
I felt really down and sad all day. I didn’t feel like writing anything!
Friday, October 31
Today something interesting happened. A nice beautiful blond girl in short shorts started jogging near the cemetery and passed my grave within a few feet. The way she dressed could make any dead person alive. I felt that my tombstone moved up a few inches. I know if all of my brain was functioning, then I could go a few inches higher.
Sunday, November 3
Bad news! My yesterday’s memories were eaten by rats. I was taking a nap and somehow a few rats that are usually running around here chewed them all.
I don’t remember what I wrote about.
The light bulb on the tall post near the cemetery was blown out this afternoon and it is really dark around here. The cemetery looks really spooky.
Monday, November 3
Today, early in the morning I jumped up from my sleep by the loud noise of the lawn mowers. A few big men were cutting the grass in the cemetery. They made so much dust. I started cursing because Sunday is usually considered the day that most people sleep late. Then, I remembered that I am dead and time or days do not apply to me.
I enjoyed the smell of the cut grass exactly like when I was alive. Of course my allergy started acting up again. I sneezed all day and scared the hell all those rats.
Tuesday, November 4
I realized that I am not lucky even as a dead person. A fat and short man started jogging around the path through my grave. He had a big and ugly dog running with him. They stood by my stone to take a break. Then the damn dog did his thing right there. The smell was killing me. I was about to throw up. Thank God that it was a hot and sunny day and the dog’s urine evaporated quickly.
Wednesday, November 5
Today they buried a middle aged man next to me. He is a fun guy. Very hyper and acts like he is not dead at all. He talks a lot and tells me about his life up there. It’s good that I have so much time to listen to his stories, since he started from his childhood time.
Thursday, November 6
Today it was raining all day. My casket started leaking really bad and I was soaking wet. There was lots of thunder and lightning up there. I must say I am happy that I am not out there with this terrible weather; otherwise I could be scared to death.
Friday, November 7
The other grave site that was on the left of me was filled today. They brought a young girl for that spot. The whole family was there and crying.
She seems very kind and nice. I found out that she is deaf and mute. We had a hard time communicating. You can imagine; being underground and trying to talk in “sign language”. She told me that; one day, out of no where, she got tired of her life and decided to commit suicide. We talked a lot all day and a good part of the evening until it got dark and I could not see her signs. If I was alive, I could invite her for a candle light dinner. But here, this won’t be too practical.
Monday, November 10
It is 3 days now since I did my last memoir. I did not have any time to myself to sit down (or in my case to lie down) to write anything. I got really involved with this girl. I feel alive with her. Now I spend all of my time with her. I never thought that I could fall for a deaf and mute girl specially a dead one. She likes me too and today she said that she wants to spend the rest of her life with me and I feel that she is dead serious about it. I told her; “if you don’t go anywhere, I won’t either”. She laughed out loud (in her mute way). I laughed at my joke too. Then we laughed together for hours and hours. I think the man and his dog heard our laughter too. I say that because all of a sudden his jogging stopped and we never saw him or his dog near the cemetery again.
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